Choose Your Friends Wisely (Proverbs 12:26)
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Proverbs 12:26
The righteous should choose his friends carefully,
For the way of the wicked leads them astray.
Ah, this verse is a gut check. It’s so simple and so clear: Be careful who you surround yourself with. But let’s be honest – do we really do this?
Yesterday, we looked at Proverbs 17:17 and talked about true friends – the ones who love at all times and are born for adversity. But today, we’re warned about the flip side: friends who lead us down the wrong path, the ones who lead us astray.
And let’s be real – sometimes we ignore this warning. We surround ourselves with people like Samson did – people who don’t share our values, don’t follow Jesus, and don’t belong to the same family of faith.
And I know it goes without saying, but I’ll say it anyway:
Never ever make an intimate friend with someone who is not already a friend of God. Be wise and intentional in choosing your closest friends.
Why? Because friendship shapes you. It directs your steps, either toward life or toward destruction.
Psalm 119:63 says, ‘I am a companion of all who fear you, of those who keep your precepts’.
That’s the kind of inner circle we should aim for. People who fear God. People who are walking in the same direction as us – toward Jesus.
Now here’s a cautionary tale:
In 2 Samuel 13, we meet Amnon. He had a friend named Jonadab, who was, as verse 3 tells us, “a very crafty man.” And Jonadab didn’t lead Amnon closer to God; rather, he led him into sin. When Amnon confessed his feelings for Tamar, who was his own sister, Jonadab gave him terrible advice, encouraging him to fake being ill so he could force Tamar to sleep with him.
That advice led to Amnon’s sin, Tamar’s pain, and ultimately Amnon’s murder.
And all of it started with one thing: the wrong friend.
It’s the same warning we see in 1 Corinthians 15:33: “Do not be deceived: ‘Bad company corrupts good morals.’” Or Proverbs 13:20 (which we will look at later this year): “Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but a companion of fools suffers harm.”
Who you walk with matters.
Never make an intimate friend with someone who is not already a friend of God.
Now, let me clarify something: This doesn’t mean we avoid non-believers altogether. We’re called to befriend, love, and serve those who don’t know Jesus. But the kind of friendship we see with Ruth and Naomi, or David and Jonathan – those deep, intimate, ride-or-die relationships? Those should be reserved for people who share your faith.
Lastly, I would say this isn’t just good advice – it’s Gospel-centered. Jesus Himself modeled this perfectly. He surrounded Himself with an inner circle of disciples who shared His mission. And while He loved, reached out, and befriended sinners, His closest relationships reflected God’s design for community – helping one another grow in holiness and walk in obedience to the Father.
Now as we reflect on this verse, Jesus’ example, and God’s design for relationships, here are a few questions to help us examine our own lives:
Who am I walking with? And in what direction are we going?
And then I also think it’s helpful to ask this question more often:
Will this be or is this a useful friendship to me?
As in, will being friends with this person point and push me closer to Jesus?
Think through those questions now and later, and let’s take our present thoughts to the Lord in prayer.
